Doing Antiracism (Pt 1: Show up and don’t bail)
By far the most common reaction to the sunset racism blog has been, okay what do we do about it? When do we get to the part where we sunset racism? What’s the plan?
Can you skip to the end? We know you’ve thought about this!
Well, no I can’t… and, yes, I guess I have.
I’ve especially gotten this reaction from folks who know me well.
I am an entrepreneur. I get a rush out of acting at breakneck speed. I’ve produced some pretty interesting results that way in my life. I like to put things to work in the world, skip to the end, and move the action forward.
I’ve tried rushing into antiracism work to “help.” What I’ve learned is that it doesn’t actually work. … at all. In fact, in my experience it frequently does more harm than good for white folks to just jump in with both feet. I have a lot more to say about that later in this post and in this series.
But, if we’re not rushing, how do we urgently address our role at the root of the technology of racism?
We know we have to do something, but doesn’t it sometimes seem like everything we do just makes things worse?
It’s a maze designed to trap us. Everything we do and say seems to make things worse, but do nothing and we are right back where we started complicit in the perpetuating the technology of Racism/White Supremacy.
The technology of racism is designed to take advantage of the groups of white folks who do nothing while hiding our own complicity from ourselves. So how do we break that cycle? How do we get into action, as white people, without perpetrating more harm in the world? How do we interrupt our complicity in whiteness and do our part to sunset racism?
Here’s what I’ve got so far. I’d love to hear from you guys about what you have found that works (or doesn’t work) in the comments.
Fools rush in, but that doesn’t mean you get to quit and go home
When White people in general (and me in particular) rush into antiracist and Black and Brown spaces without having reflected on the impacts of racism/whiteness, and without having defused our automatic, racist ways of being, our impact is almost inevitably counterproductive.
On automatic, I produce racist results, even when my words and actions are well intentioned. I’ve hurt Black and Brown people and communities, and you probably will too if you just jump in on automatic.
That’s how the technology functions. It’s not personal to you and me. We are weaponized, with our unthinking, automatic consent, by the technology of racism/whiteness.
I’m not talking about the blatantly racist white supremacists. Sure, it’s easy to see how they’re harmful. But we can’t allow ourselves to be distracted by focusing on them, as tempting as it is.
We’re not talking about “them” right now. We’re talking about “us”: well intentioned, explicitly “NON-RACIST”, “woke” white people showing up ostensibly “to help.”
First, we demand a lot of time and attention from Black and Brown leaders and organizers (who are frequently already stretched to the max by having to do unpaid (or undervalued) antiracism work.
We come to Black spaces and neighborhoods with “new” ideas to help; insisting Black and Brown folks pay attention to us with declarations of support, resources, and solidarity.
Then when things get rough, or the resources are drained, we disappear.
I’m doing some volunteer antiracism work with a community that’s important to me that’s having a racial reckoning.
The Black and Brown team there is understandably ambivalent about the sudden interest of White folks in participation in diversity and equity initiatives. They’ve seen it before, and it simply never lasts. They don’t want to get left high and dry, by white folks… again.
How do we keep from being the “nice white parents*” that leave our Black and Brown friends in the lurch?
Here’s what I’ve seen work:
You don’t get to be part of the antiracism conversation if you’re not doing anything. Just reading about it is necessary but not sufficient. Start someplace. It can be small and you can work your way up. Get into action and, while you do, start reflecting about what you learn. Don’t fall into the trap of needing it to be perfect.
Need inspiration?
Here’s call to action at #blacklivesmatter.
Teenager Tilly Krishna created this antiracist calendar to help white folks become antiracist in small steps, one day at a time
Once you get your feet wet, go to work in your own communities: your workplace, your industry, your schools, your hobbies, your churches. The technology of racism promulgates bottom-up. We need antiracism to promulgate bottom-up, person-to-person, too. You may find some of your communities are highly segregated. Antiracism is important in these spaces, too.
White folks need to have something at stake for ourselves when we participate in antiracism work. If we’re there because we want to “help” Black folks, we’re already operating out of a racist context and we’re never going to be able to sustain our participation.
Declare what’s in it for you and yours. For me, I am passionately committed to liberating myself from being brainwashed and weaponized. I want my kids to live in a world free of racism and white supremacy. Take a look at what’s in it for you, and share it with somebody (and everybody) who cares about you. (If nothing else, feel free to leave it in the comments here!)
Create or find communities of other white antiracists (or white folks who aspire to be antiracists) so we can hold each other to account and help each other process, identify, interrupt, and overcome our racist conditioning. Work through our issues with these small group communities, regularly, in advance, so that we don’t perpetuate racism in realtime on Black and Brown folks in our lives. Practice being antiracist with white folks, so we’re not weaponized at work and school against Black and Brown folks.
Personally I’ve found my local chapter of Showing Up for Racial Justice to be a great place to start to connect with other antiracist white folks, but I do my most intimate antiracism with a close group of friends that I talk to once a week.
Reflect on what you’re willing to give up (and what you’re NOT willing to give up) to be antiracist. The institutions you live inside afford you more power, privilege, and resources than your Black and Brown colleagues and friends. Are you willing to stand down and let them lead? Are you willing to earn less so they can earn more? Are you willing to give up your speaking time at the industry conference or the PTA meeting? What aren’t you willing to do? Are you willing to tell the truth about that? Start or continue telling the truth about that.
In our efforts to create antiracist communities of white folks we need to find a way to establish and maintain connection and communication with communities of Black and Brown folks. Take your cues and follow the leadership of Black antiracists about what’s important, centered, and a priority for antiracism work in your communities.
When working with Black and Brown folks, follow a policy of “First, cause no harm.” This means you want to (generally speaking) AVOID PROCESSING YOUR FEELINGS ABOUT YOUR OWN RACISM WITH BLACK AND BROWN FOLKS.** You may at some point in this journey feel terrible. You may want to rage. You may want to cry. You may want to talk about how unfair it all is. By all means, white folks, lets cry it out, and give each other compassionate attention so we can heal and grow and progress. But do not burden your Black and Brown friends with supporting you in this!
Best case, is you will drain them of their time and attention, unjustly. The usual result is that your will hurt them and reopen wounds. The worst case is you will actually really harm them. If Black or Brown folks explicitly invite you to talk to them about race or racism, (or participate in antiracist action): listen more than you talk, minimize harm you might cause, and resist, by all means, the urge to take over or turn it into a conversation about your feelings.
When things get uncomfortable, you will want to quit. Your antiracism work might seem hopeless, or useless, inconvenient or embarrassing. Resolve now that you will persevere when this happens. Ask your white antiracism community to support you in this. If you do stop, for any reason, do you level best to leave everybody whole and complete.
Sometime you may realize that you, yourself, are actually a problem (or the problem) in some environment or community or project are working on or in. I’ve got good news/bad news for you. Realizing this actually the point of white antiracism work. It may occur to you, since you’re causing the problem, that bailing out or quitting would be what’s best for everybody. If you find yourself in this situation, you’re going to want to engage your community of white antiracists to coach you about it. Don’t go it alone. This is where shit gets real.
We don’t actually get any points for suffering, beating ourselves up or wallowing in guilt. It doesn’t do anybody any good. If we make a mess, lets clean it up, and figure out how to do better next time. Our mistakes, honestly shared, will help other white folks do better if we’re talking to each other about it.
Rejoice and experience satisfaction from taking antiracist action in community. The rewards for for “doing antiracism” are real and profound and authentic. The technology of Racism and Whiteness will try and tell you it’s natural to be isolated and alone. It’s a lie. Being joyful in the face of racism and white supremacy is a form of revolution
Part Two in the “Doing Antiracism” Series is where we will talk about how to deal with our own white fragility.. or as I like to think about it, how to be responsible for having been weaponized by the technology of racism, and the standards of white supremacy.
Thanks for being part of my antiracism community.
* (For a great case study on the unintended consequences of “nice white people” trying to help and then ghosting, check out the popular “Nice White Parents” podcast from the NY Times. The podcast tracks the 60 year history seemingly well-meaning white parents interfering with a public school in Brooklyn meant to serve Black and Brown people and then not not sending their kids there other shenanigans.)
** There are exceptions, obviously to this generalization. If a close Black friend, or teacher, or colleague invites you (explicitly) to process your feelings with them, treat this as something extremely intimate. As such, I suggest you follow the standard of consent that you would for other forms of intimacy. Be sure you have each other’s enthusiastic and deep consent, and make sure that if one of your withdraws consent that you stop and take care of each other appropriately.